The commandment "You shall not commit adultery." is a poor starting point. Any expansion of this command gives the listener a suggestion of what to try when nobody is looking. I knew there must be a better way. First of all, all groups must be treated equally. Men and women, laity and religous, married and single,rich and poor with no exceptions. Exceptions cause scandal.

A better approach is to turn the negative command "You shalt not commit adultery" into a positive command. "The only moral use of sex is for the couple to join as one in an attempt to start a child that the parents intend to raise to know, love and serve God."

As the wife is the one to get pregnant then she should be the one to decide when a child is to be started. While the husband should arrange for the family's comfort and well being.